Secular Christmas

[elizabeth_mn]

It’s December, and I am switching into full-time Secular Christmas Mode. For the next 3 weeks, I am going to focus (almost) exclusively on making gifts, decorations, cookies, and all the rest. I will be sprinkling glitter on pretty much anything that doesn’t move.

We are not a religious household, and I wish I had a better name for our favorite holiday than Secular Christmas, but there you are. I don’t. And since “Christmas” is the word everyone else is using, I figure I’d better just go with it.

I identified as pagan for many years, and now I think I’m too lazy to continue doing that. My husband is into meditation and believes in angels and the sentience of rocks, so we don’t have an atheist household, really. I tried for a long time to morph my Christmas around my beliefs, but it always felt a little false.

Now we just have a totally godless holiday. It’s about lights and glitter and songs, family and friends and good food. It’s about gifts and cookies and time off work. It doesn’t need to have a specific spiritual component. I can put that elsewhere in my life.

I love gift-giving (and, of course, receiving, too) and I’m striving to create a balance between the joy of gifts and my non-materialist values. Gets me thinking about work, family, money, life, and the Inter-Connectedness Of All Things.

I bought a chair recently. (Please bear with me, I promise this is going somewhere.) Now I really didn’t have this chair in the budget, but I’d been ogling it at Ikea for months, and finally I just had a spare hundred burning a hole in my bank account and went for it. And it’s nice, and I think I needed it, and I don’t regret it.

But.

It has served as a reminder to me that it’s better to use your money on experiences than objects. Christmas coming up makes me think about this anyway. There are about a bajillion things I would be buying right now, for myself and everyone I love, if I had a little bit more stable work. But the things, they weigh you down after a while, and the shine gets dull, and the rush of something new fades. But experiences last longer.

I know, this isn’t new. We all know this, right? But of course,I forget. And of course, I love having things. And I think I’ve gotten pretty good at choosing things that provide enjoyment that lasts. But I feel like I want to re-prioritize and put experiences a little higher.

To sum up, I think I should put more money/time/effort into travel. Travel for fun, for costume events, to see things, to do things, with family and without. And doing things in my home city, too.

Also, I just can’t wait for Secular Christmas!!

Comments

[the-aristocat.livejournal.com]

Finnish Christmas is almost always, even in the Christian homes, mostly just about Santa, reindeers, decorations, food and gifts, so I've grown up thinking Christmas as somewhat religious-free holiday. I think they have even recently banned any religious Christmas songs in schools in their Christmas fetes. So I guess my Christmas is a lot like the one you have at your home.
My personal favorite Christmas traditions are eating the morning rice porridge watching Tim Burton movies, going to sauna, giving gifts and eating dinner. And this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FReZqgTjS8I

And I'm 100% with you on that stuff vs. experiences.

[ashamanja-babu.livejournal.com]

Ok, that video was seriously weird!! There should be a word for creepy and funny at the same time.

I think most americans have a non-religious christmas, too. But the extremists are always the loudest.

[bauhausfrau.livejournal.com]

That video = hhhahahahhahahahahaha!!

[christylee.livejournal.com]

My family's Christmas was pretty much this. There are religious people in the family and I suppose I lean Christian (a whole therapy discussion on its own) but for the most part Christmas always been about family gathering.

[jenthompson.livejournal.com]

I'm totally with you on the experience vs. things concept!

[bauhausfrau.livejournal.com]

Given my husband's an atheist, my dad's an agnostic and I'm a sort of Unitarian/Buddhist hybrid it's not too surprising that our Christmas is much like yours - secular with a focus on friends, family, food, crafts, cookies, trees and giving.

And yes, experiences over things! So much more meaningful in the long run.

[bellamissella.livejournal.com]

Thank you for this post! This is something I've been struggling with the last few years since I left my life-enveloping religion (Mormonism). Christmas was never my favorite holiday, but now that I feel I *don't* believe in the "history" and Christian-ness of Christmas I've had a hard time reconciling how to approach and celebrate it. I'm glad to hear there are people who approach it in a way that I like. Taking the good "values" of Christmas (family, friends, giving, love, etc.) and not having to focus on some so called "spiritual" aspect of it.

I'm going to my boyfriend's families (divorced parents means two celebrations!) for Christmas and they celebrate in this same way. I'm looking forward to my first real Christmas in a non-religious environment. I love the sparkle and excitement of it all too, plus I love getting and giving gifts. And there are so many fun traditions my family has that don't have to do with church, but it's been confusing for me to approach it lately. So thanks again for sharing your own thoughts! They've helped me feel a little more at peace about still enjoying it! ;P

BTW, I also have been interested in paganism lately. When you say you are/were pagan in what sense do you mean that? The traditional pre-Christian term? Cause it always makes me think of the way that Christians use it as a derogatory term for someone who's non-religious. I guess my mind is just confused in general since leaving the church. Knowing the way religious people see the world (from my own experience of being there) vs a much more secular view since leaving, I get a little confused as to how other people see things. Sorry, now I'm just babbling! But again, thanks!

[ashamanja-babu.livejournal.com]

You're welcome - I was really hoping this post would reach someone who feels like you do.

Try this article: http://www.slate.com/articles/life/faithbased/2008/12/no_reason_for_the_season.html

Also this one; though the bias is obvious here I do like the general sentiment: http://www.amplified-atheist.com/2012/11/22/christmas-is-secular/

As for paganism, I mean the current new-wave, pantheistic, earth-based spirituality. The kind that draws on old traditions without trying to replicate them exactly. I was active with CUUPS for a while (http://www.cuups.org/) and they are a great group. The reason I have a hard time with the "pagan" label right now is because I felt the literal-ness started clashing with my deeply-held scientific beliefs, and because I am too lazy to go to rituals. :)